Child of the wilderness
Born into emptiness
Learn to be lonely
Learn to find your way in darkness
Who will be there for you
Comfort and care for you
Learn to be lonely
Learn to be your one companion
Never dreamed out in the world
There are arms to hold you?
You've always known
Your heart was on its own
So laugh in your loneliness
Child of the wilderness
Learn to be lonely
Learn how to love life that is lived alone
Learn to be lonely
Life can be lived
Life can be loved
Alone
The songs of Phantom of the Opera keep playing in my mind for the past few weeks. I searched back my CD collections and start to listen to the songs I like most-- The Phantom of The Opera. I love the ending song- 'Learn to be lonely'.
It speaks right into everyone's heart. It is undeniable that we have to learn to be lonely. Stepping into working world lets me discover that there are difference when I was studying compare to working now. People are more willing to share their thoughts and feelings while studying compare to working. We become more secretive and try to keep everything to ourselves, scared to expose our true self.
But God asks us to be true in our Christian life, to live every second that brings honour to Him. I know that I'm not alone in Christ. However, there are thousands and millions of people out there who live their life being lonely not only physically but emotionally.
Disappointments come, hardships occur... God says that it is through all these, we know how blessed we are and how God has brought and will bring us through. I can see problems as a way of God bringing me one step closer to knowing him. But, to those who don't understand.. disappointment is purely discouragement in their lives.
The call is there, to learn to serve and not to be served; to learn to comfort and not to be comforted; to learn to be a good listener to others..to learn to respect people... to learn to understand and be patient..to learn to be humble...
I pray that I may not be a Sunday Christian... but God may use me in my daily life to touch other's life. I want to be a living testimony... the road is narrow, hardship comes, disappointment appears but it's worth traveling when God is beside me always..
Be courageous, be strong.. my heart, my soul and my mind...do learn to listen to God's voice...may His peace surrounds you.. may you find joy in serving Him...
CHEERS!! :)
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Friday, August 3, 2007
My thoughts...
My life, God's way... it's always good to reflect back the thoughts that once were in my mind, a commitment to God to live my life to the fullest to honor Him in all I do. Two months of stepping into a working world, I didn't regret taking this step to continue to serve God and obey Him in my daily life. No doubt, it is hard and there is still a long way to go.
I love my job a lot; not because it is an easy task. Indeed, it is a challenging one that uncertainties await me once i step into my office. God assures me that he has a purpose in putting me there. A Christian is a christian wherever he goes, whatever he does...not only on Sunday, but everyday, every second, we are God's children, His ambassadors. We should not be carrying a mask but to be a true self whether in church or outside the battle field.
I love my colleagues, everyone of us has different characters, unique in our own ways. Just like a church, we must work as a body. People may not see the importance of working as a body--a body built up by different parts,given different functions yet heading towards a same purpose. Indeed, it is always easy to speak than to do..yet, that is what I prayed--that God may lead, he may guide and he controls the situation. Bad things may come but it is only when we have gone through bad moments then only we know how to appreciate and give thanks for the blessings that come our way.
I love my job a lot; not because it is an easy task. Indeed, it is a challenging one that uncertainties await me once i step into my office. God assures me that he has a purpose in putting me there. A Christian is a christian wherever he goes, whatever he does...not only on Sunday, but everyday, every second, we are God's children, His ambassadors. We should not be carrying a mask but to be a true self whether in church or outside the battle field.
I love my colleagues, everyone of us has different characters, unique in our own ways. Just like a church, we must work as a body. People may not see the importance of working as a body--a body built up by different parts,given different functions yet heading towards a same purpose. Indeed, it is always easy to speak than to do..yet, that is what I prayed--that God may lead, he may guide and he controls the situation. Bad things may come but it is only when we have gone through bad moments then only we know how to appreciate and give thanks for the blessings that come our way.
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Pride Kills
I always think that everything is under my control and things will go smoothly as long as I keep my principal well, take good care of it and eventually, it will end well. However, I prove myself wrong. It is while I have so much confidence on myself that there the danger of falling flat is so near,strong and vivid. Humbly I come before the Lord, I seek for forgiveness as pride has overtaken me and create in me a strong confidence on myself yet unknowing that it's a no.1 killer that kills my relationship with God.
I'm so complacent with things that I owned. I have a job, though not earning alot, still afford to sustain my living; I have parents to accompany me; I have free time....But what are all these if there's no God in my life? I start to lose focus, laziness crawls slowly into my life,intends to comfort me with tonnes of excuses of not obeying God in my daily life. The power of His Word and the importance of prayer once spurred me to continue to seek Him daily. My previous few posts spoke so loudly about how important for me to depend on God daily... just less than a month, things change so quickly. I laugh at myself, hah!! My pride kills me, the second I start to rely on myself and my strength, there I start to fall unconciously. How easily can a person be defeated by himself when he starts to lose focus on God, yet, how many of us will take it seriously with this disease that will bring disaster to our spiritual life.
I questioned myself: Does coming back mean that serving God has stopped? Does starting my work life mean that I'm too tired to commit in serving in the ministry that God has called me? I tend to give myself alot of excuses of being a pew warmer..." I served before, I should take a short break now".. Instead,there shouldn't be any chance of 'pause' in serving if my heart, my soul and my mind is right with God. The passion and the love for Him should be so strong that there's no time to think of stop loving Him in ALL that I do... yet, I love myself more than the One who loves me so much, the One who gave His Son to die on the cross for you and me, the One who does not see my weaknesses and my ugliness and reject me...the One who created the whole universe yet sees a tiny little one of His creation as precious in His eyes.... How could I forget? How could I ignore? How daring that I just want to please myself not Him? Forgive me Lord....
Don't and never ever under estimate the power of our own desires, they can destroy us. Thank God for giving us His Holy Spirit to teach us and bring us back to Him wherever we go astray. One once said that a true Christian can never backslide easily, they may fall but once chosen by God, we can never run away from Him, His hand covers us, protects us, keeps us near to Him.. how wonderful it is if we learn to know Him in depth.
I'm so complacent with things that I owned. I have a job, though not earning alot, still afford to sustain my living; I have parents to accompany me; I have free time....But what are all these if there's no God in my life? I start to lose focus, laziness crawls slowly into my life,intends to comfort me with tonnes of excuses of not obeying God in my daily life. The power of His Word and the importance of prayer once spurred me to continue to seek Him daily. My previous few posts spoke so loudly about how important for me to depend on God daily... just less than a month, things change so quickly. I laugh at myself, hah!! My pride kills me, the second I start to rely on myself and my strength, there I start to fall unconciously. How easily can a person be defeated by himself when he starts to lose focus on God, yet, how many of us will take it seriously with this disease that will bring disaster to our spiritual life.
I questioned myself: Does coming back mean that serving God has stopped? Does starting my work life mean that I'm too tired to commit in serving in the ministry that God has called me? I tend to give myself alot of excuses of being a pew warmer..." I served before, I should take a short break now".. Instead,there shouldn't be any chance of 'pause' in serving if my heart, my soul and my mind is right with God. The passion and the love for Him should be so strong that there's no time to think of stop loving Him in ALL that I do... yet, I love myself more than the One who loves me so much, the One who gave His Son to die on the cross for you and me, the One who does not see my weaknesses and my ugliness and reject me...the One who created the whole universe yet sees a tiny little one of His creation as precious in His eyes.... How could I forget? How could I ignore? How daring that I just want to please myself not Him? Forgive me Lord....
Don't and never ever under estimate the power of our own desires, they can destroy us. Thank God for giving us His Holy Spirit to teach us and bring us back to Him wherever we go astray. One once said that a true Christian can never backslide easily, they may fall but once chosen by God, we can never run away from Him, His hand covers us, protects us, keeps us near to Him.. how wonderful it is if we learn to know Him in depth.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
There's always a choice
He was oppressed and afflicted yet he did not open his mouth, he was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth. - Isaiah 53:7
The centurion, seeing what had happened, praised God and said," Surely this was a righteous man." When all the people who had gathered to witness this sight saw what took place, they beat their breasts and went away. But all those who knew him, including the women who had followed him from Galilee, stood at a distance, watching these things. -Luke 23:47-49
I start to discover the beauty of God's Word and how it really becomes my source of strength and wisdom as I journey through my working life. Everyday, new challenges come my way especially in forms of criticisms, negative comments, false statements, gossips that I do not want to hear from yet happen.
When Jesus was led to be crucified and to die on the cross, knowing that He himself did not sin,He did not defend, fight back or flee away from the hands of those who captured him the night before his crucifixion. He said nothing not because he has done anything wrong but he knows what he is doing: to die on the cross, to save his people from eternal death and from the wrath of God. He humbly, consciously being led to the cross, all in all, to obey God and fulfill the wonders of God's grace and love that we will be saved through him. He did not fight back, argue even though he has the power to do so.
The wonder is that the truth will always be revealed at the end of the day; when Jesus died on the cross with the miracles that followed during his hour of death ( the temple curtain was torn into two, earthquakes,darkness covers the day..), soldiers, people who were on that spot knew that they have killed the wrong person...indeed Jesus is the Son of God! The truth is revealed, those who criticised Jesus felt ashamed, guilty of what they have done...some hide, some repent.. Indeed, God knows how to protect those whom he has chosen, not only Jesus, but His children on earth...
God's wisdom is what I need to face my daily challenges. I can choose to fight back when I hear what is unbeneficial to me, I can choose to be angry, I can choose to be ignorant and be stubborn. But, I am called to choose to follow God's way. Taking revenge or fighting back, though I may win the argument, may cause broken relationships, hardships, negative impressions and bad testimony. I choose to be like Christ, silent is not always equal to foolish, but to God, in some ways, it is the wisest choice compare to defending and rebuking. It makes my life easier, to see people back-stabbing, gossipping yet not affecting my mood because as long as God knows what I'm doing, as long as I know what I'm doing does not sin against God, I should not be so calculative and hold tightly on it... let God settle the problem, I should focus on the tasks given to me in my workplace.
I rejoice because I find peace and joy in living my daily life with God's Word as my guidance. There are more challenges ahead of me, I should not fear but constantly pray not only for myself but colleagues who help me and also those whom God has put into my life to make my life more challenging...haha... thank God for them as without them, I may not know how great is my God.
The centurion, seeing what had happened, praised God and said," Surely this was a righteous man." When all the people who had gathered to witness this sight saw what took place, they beat their breasts and went away. But all those who knew him, including the women who had followed him from Galilee, stood at a distance, watching these things. -Luke 23:47-49
I start to discover the beauty of God's Word and how it really becomes my source of strength and wisdom as I journey through my working life. Everyday, new challenges come my way especially in forms of criticisms, negative comments, false statements, gossips that I do not want to hear from yet happen.
When Jesus was led to be crucified and to die on the cross, knowing that He himself did not sin,He did not defend, fight back or flee away from the hands of those who captured him the night before his crucifixion. He said nothing not because he has done anything wrong but he knows what he is doing: to die on the cross, to save his people from eternal death and from the wrath of God. He humbly, consciously being led to the cross, all in all, to obey God and fulfill the wonders of God's grace and love that we will be saved through him. He did not fight back, argue even though he has the power to do so.
The wonder is that the truth will always be revealed at the end of the day; when Jesus died on the cross with the miracles that followed during his hour of death ( the temple curtain was torn into two, earthquakes,darkness covers the day..), soldiers, people who were on that spot knew that they have killed the wrong person...indeed Jesus is the Son of God! The truth is revealed, those who criticised Jesus felt ashamed, guilty of what they have done...some hide, some repent.. Indeed, God knows how to protect those whom he has chosen, not only Jesus, but His children on earth...
God's wisdom is what I need to face my daily challenges. I can choose to fight back when I hear what is unbeneficial to me, I can choose to be angry, I can choose to be ignorant and be stubborn. But, I am called to choose to follow God's way. Taking revenge or fighting back, though I may win the argument, may cause broken relationships, hardships, negative impressions and bad testimony. I choose to be like Christ, silent is not always equal to foolish, but to God, in some ways, it is the wisest choice compare to defending and rebuking. It makes my life easier, to see people back-stabbing, gossipping yet not affecting my mood because as long as God knows what I'm doing, as long as I know what I'm doing does not sin against God, I should not be so calculative and hold tightly on it... let God settle the problem, I should focus on the tasks given to me in my workplace.
I rejoice because I find peace and joy in living my daily life with God's Word as my guidance. There are more challenges ahead of me, I should not fear but constantly pray not only for myself but colleagues who help me and also those whom God has put into my life to make my life more challenging...haha... thank God for them as without them, I may not know how great is my God.
Sunday, June 10, 2007
A forgetful mind
I started working back in Ipoh since 1st June, have gone through 7 working days. I still feel uncertain of my job description but looking forward to see and experience the new challenges that are ahead of me. Sometimes, I may feel pressured with the work I'm doing, handling it carefully, trying to minimize the mistakes that may be unbeneficial to the company and also myself. Maybe I should take things one at a time, slowly develop my confidence in the new phase that I'm entering into.
Sometimes, I just tend to forget why I chose to come back Ipoh to work at the first place. These few days of working in Ipoh brings unsatisfaction in my heart, I didn't really find joy that I experienced at my previous jobs either in KL or Ipoh. I started to examine and question myself, where have things gone wrong? I started to think back on the purpose of me choosing to come back to Ipoh instead of continuing my life in KL after graduate.
My core purpose is to spend more time with family while I'm still available ( in terms of still in single status). These first few days in Ipoh is a test for me. There's not really joy in me as I did start to blame myself on why I come back where KL is full of freedom and entertainment compare to Ipoh. Have I forgotten the calling? Have I forgotten the promises that I've made? Yes, my selfishness of just wanting to fulfill my own desires, to find happiness with the entertainment I once get from KL hinder me, cover my love upon my family. It does not only affect my life but also people around me especially my family members. Once hearing the good news of me coming back to work has now become questions in their mind : Have my little girl made a right choice to come back to work? Is she feeling happy now? Are we, as parents have forced her to come back to work? Will she be happier if she stays in KL in the first place??
I've forgotten the feelings of those who love me... I am too focus on how I feel, thinking of what I might be doing at this moment if I'm in KL. I've neglected my family's feelings on the current situation that I'm facing which will bring them uneasiness also. Is the place that I choose to work so important? Is entertainment so important to me?
I've forgotten the calling of God on earth. Why should I ponder so much on how I feel instead of starting to think of what I can do since I've moved back to Ipoh. Yup, why should I keep wasting my time on unwanted thoughts and leaving the importance of serving God wherever I am, wherever God has put me in.
I pray for his guidance. The joy should come from my inner heart, my soul and my mind. What is God calling me to do here while I'm in the place He has put me in. May he continue to speak to me. My work is not my all, but my soul is what I should be caring of. My joy comes when I start to obey God and do what he wants. God will lead me, he will not leave me alone as what he has promised me and to those whom he loves and those who obey him.
I will wait upon his guidance. One day, when I look back and ponder on the journey of my life, I may see the wonder of his hands that I may not understand now but will be revealed when time comes. Dear Lord, please constantly remind me of your love that you have shown on me that I should feel blessed and joyful rather than pitying myself not knowing the abundant grace and love that you've shown me now and will be showering throughout my life forever.
Sometimes, I just tend to forget why I chose to come back Ipoh to work at the first place. These few days of working in Ipoh brings unsatisfaction in my heart, I didn't really find joy that I experienced at my previous jobs either in KL or Ipoh. I started to examine and question myself, where have things gone wrong? I started to think back on the purpose of me choosing to come back to Ipoh instead of continuing my life in KL after graduate.
My core purpose is to spend more time with family while I'm still available ( in terms of still in single status). These first few days in Ipoh is a test for me. There's not really joy in me as I did start to blame myself on why I come back where KL is full of freedom and entertainment compare to Ipoh. Have I forgotten the calling? Have I forgotten the promises that I've made? Yes, my selfishness of just wanting to fulfill my own desires, to find happiness with the entertainment I once get from KL hinder me, cover my love upon my family. It does not only affect my life but also people around me especially my family members. Once hearing the good news of me coming back to work has now become questions in their mind : Have my little girl made a right choice to come back to work? Is she feeling happy now? Are we, as parents have forced her to come back to work? Will she be happier if she stays in KL in the first place??
I've forgotten the feelings of those who love me... I am too focus on how I feel, thinking of what I might be doing at this moment if I'm in KL. I've neglected my family's feelings on the current situation that I'm facing which will bring them uneasiness also. Is the place that I choose to work so important? Is entertainment so important to me?
I've forgotten the calling of God on earth. Why should I ponder so much on how I feel instead of starting to think of what I can do since I've moved back to Ipoh. Yup, why should I keep wasting my time on unwanted thoughts and leaving the importance of serving God wherever I am, wherever God has put me in.
I pray for his guidance. The joy should come from my inner heart, my soul and my mind. What is God calling me to do here while I'm in the place He has put me in. May he continue to speak to me. My work is not my all, but my soul is what I should be caring of. My joy comes when I start to obey God and do what he wants. God will lead me, he will not leave me alone as what he has promised me and to those whom he loves and those who obey him.
I will wait upon his guidance. One day, when I look back and ponder on the journey of my life, I may see the wonder of his hands that I may not understand now but will be revealed when time comes. Dear Lord, please constantly remind me of your love that you have shown on me that I should feel blessed and joyful rather than pitying myself not knowing the abundant grace and love that you've shown me now and will be showering throughout my life forever.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
